It happens so often. How to spot it when you’re doing it or someone else is doing it to you…
Projection happens when one person feels so bad about aspects of themselves that they cannot accept their own thoughts, feelings and behaviour, so they incorrectly attribute – or project them – onto another person.
What often lies at the heart of it, is exactly that – a vulnerable heart. Projection then becomes a way of trying to defend against the experience or feelings of vulnerability.
It happens so often in life and is particularly recognisable in workplaces.
It commonly looks like “blaming”, disrespecting you, woefully bad behaviou toward you, accusations, verbal attacks, “if I can, you can…” statements, bitching and gossiping, feeling deeply hurt and wronged over something that is relatively minor and hanging on to it, knee-jerk reactions, telling you there’s something wrong with you – as you can see there’s a long list.
But what can you do?
A good way to train yourself to recognise Projection is to take a closer look at what you can see happening around you – what Projections can you see?
Observe how often you see/ experience it in your day. Being able to recognise it is a good first step.
Then start to notice how YOU respond – what do you feel, think or experience in your body. Oserve yourself gently and with kindness.
This little experiment gives you an alternative experience – that of emotional distance to just observe. Try it out.
And, when you recognise how often people do it to cope, you learn not to take anything personally.
If you think that you have trouble with Projecting – whether it’s on to others or in managing it when it happens to you, the Wise Guides can work with you to gently find out what’s underneath it and show you how to be more present and mindful in the moment without getting in a muddle.